April A-Z Topic: Money
I didn't win the lotto this weekend so I guess I won't be retiring to that
little cottage at Montville to become an eccentric/recluse with a
dozen cats and the best cult television series library in the state after all.
It's a darned shame, I
was really looking forward to picking out names for those cats.
Oh don't mind me, I do this every time I buy a ticket in a lotto
draw. I work myself up to a frenzy, deciding just how I'm going to
spend the money should I win, until I eventually begin to believe
that there's no way I can't win.
This time it was going to be a quick jaunt around the world, just for six months or so, then back home to find the house of my dreams somewhere in a lovely, hilly, remote part of the hinterlands. Somewhere where I could write whenever the muse takes me, rather than when I can find the time. It was going to be so nice.
This time it was going to be a quick jaunt around the world, just for six months or so, then back home to find the house of my dreams somewhere in a lovely, hilly, remote part of the hinterlands. Somewhere where I could write whenever the muse takes me, rather than when I can find the time. It was going to be so nice.
But, alas, I didn't win. I'm
sure there's someone else out there who's very happy right about now,
but it isn't me, worse luck. I was even going to write my letter of
resignation this morning if I'd won. I had it all worked out
Dear Boss,
I quit. See you round the funny farm,
love Me
Catchy, hey? Shame I won't be able to use it, at least not today ... but there's always next time, right?
Sadly, after reading your "rich person" goals, it seems as though you aren't ready to become a wealth eccentric yet. That's why you didn't win. If a dozen cats is in the top ten of your wealthy eccentric plans, you need to reprioritize. A dozen mecha-cats with scorpion tails bread from a mixture of DNA and fused with mechanics? Now we're talking wealthy eccentrics. No "I need a vacation" nonsense. You need truly astounding feats of wasteful behavior, like "I bought an island, hired my old boss to manage it, then leased one thousand boats to artificially generate a tsunami to get international aid for my island while also ridding me of former employers." This is what it takes to vision board being rich.
ReplyDeleteYou're right of course, now that I think about it I'm ashamed of myself. Where are my grand and completely impossible plans? Shouldn't I want to buy a monkey-pony monster or something?
DeleteMost lottery winners eventually lose it all and end up in the streets so losing is good luck.
ReplyDeleteYou're probably right, it does seem like a lot of them lose their cash awfully quickly.
DeleteI love the letter of resignation. Simple and to the point. The most I've ever won in any kind of lottery is $35, and I was so happy I nearly exploded. Then I spent the money in less than an hour. Oh well.
ReplyDeleteLOL! I think the best I ever did on a lottery draw was maybe a hundred, and I was practically tap dancing out of the news agency.
DeleteI love those lottery dreams. It's always a surefire cure if I'm having trouble falling asleep. I rarely make it past designing my dream home.
ReplyDeleteI do that too! Or just casually scroll through realestate.com.au to see what's available in the over one million section.
DeleteIt is always fun to think about how you will spend that money. Or save it. Or invest it. I am a big believer in doing a bit of all those things. I think a bit of daydreaming like this is good for the soul.
ReplyDeleteI love to think I'd be all impetuous and wasteful with my newfound wealth, but truth is I'd probably sink it into a safe, boring short term investment account.
DeleteYou can't win if you don't buy the tickets so keep trying.
ReplyDeleteManzanita
wanna buy a duck
Very true! You've got to be in it to win it.
DeleteI never win either! But I have my resignation letter prepared, just in case. ;)
ReplyDeleteAlways a good plan :D
DeleteI fully understand your point, my mother however does not and really does believe she's going to win the lottery then she can move into a house by herself and away from her children who are SO MEAN to her lol. I usually don't play unless it hits the 100 plus million mark. I figure at that point even if I match 4 or 5 numbers then I'll have enough to pay off my student loans and I'll be happy without that hanging over my proverbial head. Could be why I never win. I have limited desires and I like working most of the time. I would get a nicer house with a HUGE mother in law apartment in the back so mom can clutter up that space and leave me in my minimally decorated and much happier space.
ReplyDeleteLOL! I always think if I ever won one of the smaller prizes I'd probably feel resentful it wasn't one of the huge jackpots. Ungrateful, huh?
DeleteLOL not really, I'm just really practical. If I won 400 million after a year or two I wouldn't know what to do with myself.
DeleteI won $2 from the last ticket that I bought so I guess that's better than nothing.
ReplyDeleteThere's a woman who has a PhD in statistics who claims she figured out the math behind the lottery and proceeded to win 8 times. Lucky her.
Wow, I didn't realise that was even possible. After all, statistics are just probabilities, not facts.
DeleteNow isn't that everyone's dream? I could just imagine myself living that life while I read this post. And that reminded me I've got work to do. :P
ReplyDeleteLOL! Yep, it's great to daydream, but the work is still waiting when you wake up ;D
DeleteMost of my colleagues have the slightly simplier dream "I don't need to win the whole thing... just enough to cover the mortgage!" They are no closer to winning the lottery that way either.
ReplyDeleteOh if you're going to dream, I think you should dream big!
DeleteI thought from the title of this post that it was going to be all about how winning the lottery doesn't make for a good financial plan because people end up being more unhappy after they've won they before - but what you actually wrote was much more realistic! :)
ReplyDelete... and believable! :)
ReplyDeleteI could have gone that way ... but I'm just as bad as everyone else. I want to be rich without having to put any effort into getting there, and the lottery seems the easiest way to do that.
DeleteSix months isn't long enough, we did nearly a year last year and I can't wait to get back out again, no lottery winnings here, just saving and budgeting and rat-bag accommodations :)
ReplyDeleteRhonda @Laugh-Quotes.com
Visiting from AtoZ
Maybe I should change my plans to a year then :D
DeleteFunny how hope never dies. Even after multiple disappointments, we just think, "Next time!" I guess that's why the lottery is so successful. Someone must be making a lot of money out of it.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure they make a ruddy fortune! Even if all they're doing is keeping the money they take and giving it to other people when they win, they'd make a bomb on the interest while they held it.
DeleteI do that too, every time I buy a damn lotto ticket and then my dreams a crashed and I am depressed....I once decided I would buy loads of mini animals and have a mini animal farm...
ReplyDeleteOoh, wee little horses and teacup pigs!
DeleteThe rare times that I do buy a ticket and are then faced with the bitter disappointment of not winning, I don't buy another till that feelings forgotten. You never know do you? xxx
ReplyDeleteIt's one of those things, I think. I don't actually expect to win so I'm never really crushed when I don't, but I love the adrenalin that comes before it.
DeleteWow, it sounds like I have a gambling problem, doesn't it!
I'm thinking your financial plan is better than mine. I had six kids purely to have a better chance of someone taking care of my cranky butt in my old age. I'm crossing my fingers that at least one marries well.
ReplyDeleteI'm wondering about the cat wish, though. Isn't your current cat already rude and in charge? Do you want 10 animals bossing you around? Lots of travel? I can get behind that.
Your offspring plan is probably much better than my win-the-lotto plan. You've just got to make sure at least one of them becomes stupidly wealthy. May I recommend plumbing as a career? As far as I can tell, those guys must be living in solid gold houses with what they charge!
DeleteDon't stop dreaming :)
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely not! That's where the fun is!
DeleteWe all dream about that lottery but reality keeps us fitting in writing time when we can. I wanted a cottage near the beach.
ReplyDeleteTrue ... but wouldn't it be nice to say "I'm a professional blogger" when people asked?
DeleteThey say that lotteries are a tax on the stupid. But I believe in paying my taxes!
ReplyDeleteHey, as far as taxes go, the Tax Office has never offered to give me ten million dollars, no matter how distant the odds.
DeleteMy resignation letter would not have been a resignation letter. I would have just done a full tap dancing number on my boss's desk until security showed me out.
ReplyDeleteOoh, that sounds like fun! You could start a "I just won the Lo-tto" can can line!
DeleteShame most people lose it all in seven years.
ReplyDeleteI'm still not sure how they manage to squander it all away so quickly!
DeleteWe all need something to dream about, right? I didn't win either :p
ReplyDeleteI guess we get to keep dreaming about the next draw then ;D
DeleteYou should always have a pithy resignation letter at the ready. Well done.
ReplyDeleteAnd I wonder why no one has ever named me employee of the month...
It's a workplace essential, I think!
DeleteOther than the euphoria that would come with actually winning, there is a bit of fun with the anticipation that you could win enough money to change whatever you want to change about your life. I don't always buy tickets but when I do I have a great time imagining how to spend it.
ReplyDeleteThat's the best part of being in the draw, I think.
DeleteI am totally winning today. Watch me. Love, Delusional
ReplyDeleteOf course ... you and about a million other ticket holders ;D
DeleteHilarious and you are not alone. I too think about winning the lottery! My resignation is a taped song, "Take This Job and Shove It- I ain't workin' here no more!" Def enjoyed reading your post!
ReplyDeleteOoh, would it include an extended remix of "And I'm the one who stuffed up the photocopier"?
DeleteOK... "Just for 6 months or so," is my kind of "quick," as in jaunt. I am diggin' that. Love the Dear Boss letter.
ReplyDeleteHave a great day, Slu
Six months, twelve months, two years ... it could very easily turn into an extended trip :D
DeleteKellie, ♪Don't stop belieeeviiing, hold on to the feeliing...♪
ReplyDelete*bops along*
DeleteAh, everyone loves Journey :D
Haha I do the same thing! This delusional tendency is why I can't gamble.
ReplyDeleteLOL! I try to not gamble too often, but lottery tickets are my kryptonite.
DeleteKeep trying, at least its a good rush of fun!
ReplyDeleteKaTy Did at: Life's Ride As I See It
Very true, and all for the bargain price of a dollar a game!
DeleteYou can still pick out the names for the cats. You could write them down, and pin them to stuffed cats (the toy kind, of course) so you get used to calling them the right names. I'm sure next time will be the time.
ReplyDeleteLOL! I can just imagine my friends faces if they came over to visit and I'd filled the living room with stuffed cats that I insisted were real.
DeleteYou're so funny! My nephew won 1 million and had to split it with his dad because that was their deal. He has invested it for his two children and paid off his wife's student loans. I play every week, but only a couple of bucks.
ReplyDeleteHope you have a great week!
I love when I hear about someone actually knowing a winner, it helps to confirm that it's not all a scam by the lottery people.
DeleteI DREAM about winning the lottery. Best of luck to you next time!
ReplyDeleteAh, next time...
DeleteSince I didn't win the lottery this weekend I was hoping you did. Sorry for both of us.
ReplyDeleteMe too. We're so hard done by :(
DeleteOMG Lily's singing Journey??? You did win the lotto!
ReplyDeleteLOL! Yep, I think we're all winners with that one :D
DeleteI mean, I wouldn't throw the resignation note away... never know when the tides of luck might turn! :)
ReplyDeleteI'll keep it nice and safe so I can pull it out at a moment's notice.
DeleteYeah, wouldn't that be the best letter to write? Maybe someday.
ReplyDeleteWe can dream, I suppose.
DeleteWoah woah woah! Are you saying waiting to win the lottery is *not* a solid financial plan? Now you tell me!
ReplyDeleteApparently not, I know I was surprised! It turns out that winning the lottery is a 4 million to one chance, as compared to getting hit by lightning which is a 1.6 million to one chance.
DeleteSee, as per my post, we all get our hopes up and then get deflated when we don't win.
ReplyDeleteKellie, I do the very same thing every time I buy a lotto ticket. At this point between getting a late start at saving and the way the economy is going, I may never be able to stop working unless I win the lottery. :)
ReplyDeleteHere's how you lost it
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