Saturday, July 21, 2012

The style of the styleless...

I love fashionable home decor.  I love looking at a picture of a living room, all beautifully laid out and immaculately decorated.  My Youtube feed is full of vlogs on the topic, I can happily wallow in a home decorating magazine for an entire afternoon, and I've been left behind before in homeware stores because I was too busy inappropriately fondling the throw cushions.

I think, if I'm completely honest, the reason I love it all so much is because I have absolutely no chance of ever recreating it.

I am, I must confess, completely without style.  I know which colours are supposed to go together thanks to art class and that ever accursed colour wheel ... did anyone else hate that bloody colour wheel as much as I did ... but when I look at them I just can't seem to see which colours clash!  Does tan go with chocolate?  I'm pretty sure it does, but does THIS tan go with THIS chocolate?  It's all a mystery to me.

It's the same with furniture layout.  I know there are more ways of situating your furniture than "whack the couch against the wall opposite the TV", but I still seem to revert to it every time.  Occasionally I'll move the divider from one side of the couch to the other, but that's about it for my decorating style abilities.

Occasionally I'll give it a shot, buy something that's supposed to add a sense of personality or flair to my place, but every time, without fail, I'll pick the worst thing possible.  It'll be tacky, or clashing, or even worse, just plain odd.  What seemed like such a good idea when I was gazing covetishly in in the shop turns out to look ridiculous once it's in the harsh light of day ... or at least the harsh light of my living room.

The other day I was actually seriously considering buying plastic fruit to put in my kitchen.  Plastic fruit!  No, I have no idea why either.  The only thing I can put it down to is the fact that it was there, right in front of me in the homeware shop and something in my brain said, "Yes, genius idea!  Fake fruit!  You'll never need to worry about rotting bananas and fruit flies again!"

Of course, the fact that the fake fruit in question was in no way convincing in its evil charade didn't seem to click with me.  Instead it took a friend, bless her little cotton socks, to talk me out of what would undoubtedly have ended up being yet another home decorating disaster in a string of catastrophes.

Perhaps I just need to accept that, unless I start earning so much that I can afford to hire a decorator, I'm just not one of those people who are going to have a classy looking house.  It's always going to look slightly rumpled, not quite laid out right, and more than a little lairy to the eye.

I need to realise that my place is always going to be one of those houses that's respectable, but not aesthetically delightful.

But hey, at least the couch is comfy and the TV works.  Could be worse.

24 comments:

  1. When I was a kid, my auntie had a big bowl of plastic fruit on her living room coffee table. Very "chic" (pronounced "chick" because we didn't know better about that, either).

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    1. Yeah, I'm starting to suspect that I'm "that person". The one everyone is talking about when they tell stories about how bad their taste is.

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  2. Oh this is so how I am. It's the only reason I like Pinterest so much. I love hoarding house ideas! Of course, my house will never look that way unless some home decorator is kind enough to do it for me. I just don't have the knack for putting stuff together.

    I hated that damn color wheel too.

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    1. I remember they made us paint a colour wheel in art class. I couldn't even do that right! In the end, the art teachers and I unanimously agreed that I probably would be better with German as an elective.

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  3. My living room walls are painted the color of your last pic with a matching shag rug, a red leather couch, bright blue chair and electric yellow accessories. I call it my crayola crayon box.

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    1. Wow, that sounds colourful! Mine are just a boring cream with beige couches and brown carpets. Like I said, I don't trust myself with a colour palette.

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  4. I am obsessed with mid century modern decor and I think I did a pretty fine job decorating my living room on the cheap. However, that design aesthetic does not carry over in to either of the bedrooms. But did I mention how nice my living room looks?

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    1. The 50's style is incredibly popular, isn't it! And with second hand stuff it must be so cheap to do.

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  5. I'm kinda lost on this too.. I mean, i have a movie-quality replica sheep's heart floating in a jar of formaldehyde in my dining room. The jar is totally classy tho.

    Hugs!

    Valerie

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    1. You have a replica formaldehyded sheep's heart in your dining room? As a centrepiece? I'm a bit scared to ask what's on your coffee table!

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  6. I'm pretty good at decorating, but I usually stick to a theme. Warm, earth colors are throughout my entire apartment. My living room is gold and brown...my kitchen is yellow and brown...my room is blue and brown...and my bathroom is gold and chocolate brown. Are we sensing a theme here??? Lol My problem is incorporating POPS of fun, vibrant colors. Hmmm, interesting...

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    1. LOL! Yep, you definitely have a theme going there! My theme is "don't let the cat hair get so thick that the couch looks a different colour".

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  7. I have no vision. I have a 'cutesy' decor, but to do all the layering of color and fabric is just beyond me. I love to look at it, though!

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    1. It is pretty, isn't it! That's why I like home decorating magazines.

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  8. I am so into the decorating magazines, shows, Pinterest - I'm a junkie for the stuff and always have been. I used to go to the library and take out a stack of magazines, take them home and pour over them with a cup of tea. One of my favorite ways to spend an afternoon. I try to recreate the ideas at home and I the hunt is the most fun. Finding things on the cheap is always fun. We had plastic fruit growing up. I especially remember the grapes. So if you'd gotten them, you could've said they were all retro! Retro's in! ;)

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    1. Yeah, the plastic fruit would have been a very bad idea. I suppose I could have tried to pass it off as retro, but I suspect it would have just come across as tacky.

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  9. Oh no, not plastic fruit. Don't do it. My mom still has plastic fruit in her kitchen. But she also has an apple carved out of wood...and it's no better. I'm with you. I love those design shows and want to THINK I can recreate it, but only if I plagiarize someone else's design. But I can't afford those so here I sit in an Ikea hell.

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    1. If I got the plastic fruit, I think I'd also have to get the giant salad tongs to go on the wall too.

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  10. Hi Kellie! I am Jim and Debra sent me your way! Good to meet you.
    I can too become infatuated with fake fruit....especially when it looks SO real! But please NEVER tell my husband I said this! lol

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    1. LOL! Some of it looks so realistic, but the stuff I was looking at definitely did NOT.

      Welcome!

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  11. This is why I love some of the HGTV shows. I don't have a lot of stuff, but love seeing how others decorate and love seeing the cool furniture out there. I once went to Ikea and fell in love with all of the furniture arrangements.

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    1. Ooh, Ikea! I always get lost in there! It's a freaking maze!

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  12. As long as my walls remain red, and every room is filled with breakable clutter, I am happy. Maybe add dusty books, and drapes. Basically, I want my house to always appear haunted. That's beautiful to me.

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    1. Oh yes, if you can pull the haunted look off it works a treat!

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