Saturday, November 3, 2012

So, it turns out I'm a hardened criminal...

Did you know that I was a criminal for six year?

It's true.

For six whole years I blatantly, if not knowingly, broke a law.  I mean, it's not like I bought myself a mask and a crowbar and decided that a life of crime was the way to go, I had no idea what I was doing was even illegal, but then they do say that ignorance is no excuse.

I don't know if I've ever mentioned it here before but I'm a Pagan.  I have been since I was about ninteen or twenty years old when I first realised that pretty much everything I already believed fit into the beliefs of Paganism.  I remember reading about it in a book my brother had given to me and thinking "Oh, I'm a Pagan ... well now it all makes sense".

The only problem was that Paganism wasn't made legal in the state I live in until 2001.

So there's a good six or seven years that I was practicing an illegal religion, and I had no idea.  Hell, it never even occurred to me that there might even BE illegal religions!  No one ever said anyting to me about it, and it's not like the Pagan community was keeping themselves hidden away or anything, so I had absolutely no idea I was doing anything illegal ... until I read about those laws being repealed in a magazine.

It was a bit of a shock, I must say.

I have to imagine that Keith London, a city official in Florida, had a similar reaction when someone tried to have him charged with living in sin, another old law that no one had gotten around to removing.  I mean seriously, who even uses the expression "living in sin" in this day and age? Were they tutting about the scandal of it all while they were churning their butter and hand sewing a dress for the Sunday church social?

His response was, as you would expect from a city official, a very politely worded screw you and the horse you rode in on.

I can't imagine the complaint got very far, but I still think it's great that he was willing to stand up and say "no" in the face of an unjust law, no matter how outdated and unused.  I like to think that if someone  had turned up at my door and insisted I renounce my beliefs or face charges ... I would have told them to go jump too.   No one is going to tell me what I can and can't believe in!

Yep, I'm just a rebel I guess.

But don't tell anyone, okay?  I'm far too delicate to survive in jail.

By the way, don't forget to go and enter if you'd like to win the set of "Don'ts for..." books I'm giving away in celebration of Delightfully Ludicrous surviving to make it to it's six month anniversary.  Come on!  That's like 50 years old in blog years!!!

55 comments:

  1. I guess it shows you have a good public official when you want to get him in trouble, but the only dirt you can get on him is that he's not married.

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  2. Haha, wow! I had no idea that there were still laws like this in the U.S.!! that is crazy.

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    1. It's amazing, isn't it! I can understand how they never get removed, but the idea of someone actually trying to enforce them is ridiculous!

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  3. Lemme guess....you spit on the sidewalk, too. Right? Yep, you're definitely an out of control deliquent! (Proud of you!)

    S

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    1. Oh yea, I'm a total bad ass. I litter, I throw away mail that comes to my house addressed to other people ... I even water my garden outside of the prescribed hours!

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  4. I love those crazy laws that are still in the books today, forgotten because no one applies them anymore and still intact because no one wants to go through the "hassle" of repealing them.

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    1. I remember reading about one where you couldn't drive on the freeway without someone walking in front of you carrying a lantern.

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  5. Ah,it all makes sense now! just kidding - - I don't even really know what a pagan is. glad you never got caught, though :)

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  6. Civil disobedience - one of my favorite things!

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  7. That's incredible. Crazy world.

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    1. Imagine how many people would get arrested if they really did enforce that law!

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  8. It's only a matter of time before the law dogs catch up with you. Enjoy your freedom now 'cause I hear those ladies in the stoney lonesome don't take too kindly to Pagans. LOL!!!!

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    1. I'd never survive jail, I'm far too much of a wuss.

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  9. It's amazing how many stupid (by today's standards) laws are still on the books!!

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    1. I imagine with the speed that they work, they'll never get rid of them all.

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  10. From one pagan to another, I salute you, Sister! We shall stand together with our pentagrams raised high and shout at the naysayers. And then, as they are lighting the kindling beneath our stakes, we will sing together, "We shall overcome" until we are overcome...by the smoke. That'll show those idiots!! Robin Larkspur, proud pagan/Wiccan.

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    1. LOL! Word, sister! I'd definitely have chosen to be arrested rather than renounce Paganism, but I have to admit I'm glad I never had to make the choice.

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  11. You're a pagan? I'm shocked. Really. My dad always told me I was a heathen....particularly the time I slipped the frog underneath his pillow. I thought it was a princely gift myself.

    Whilst you and Robin are toasting your buns I'll bring marshmallows and sticks. Then I can stuff marshmallows in the guard's gubs and if the sugar shock doesn't knock them out I can hit them over the head with the sticks and rescue you. =D

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    1. Excellent! I do love to know I have a back up escape plan!

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  12. What does it mean to be a pagan? Does it just mean you aren't a Christian, or does it mean you aren't a member of any organized religion? Is paganism an organized religion, and if so do you know how many members there are? Inquiring minds want to know.

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    1. LOL! Paganism is a pretty broad term and can theoretically be anyone not Christian, but it's normally used to describe people who follow Earth based religions. Wicca is the most well known, but there are lots of different interpretations. I'm a Solitary Eclectic, which pretty much means I get to pick and choose how I express my faith.

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  13. Ha Ha! I'd never make it in jail either! Though I'm sure being pissed off at the God(s) is illegal in some places too! - Hang in there! :)

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  14. I'm in Utah living with my boyfriend for the last two years. Sadly, I've heard the "living in sin" line about 20 times more than I ever should have.

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    1. It's astounding that people still feel that way! I can respect those who choose not to do it themselves, but to tut and scold other people is just ridiculous!

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  15. There are so many stupid laws no one has ever gotten rid of. In some places in Nebraska, it is illegal to sneeze or burp during church. And, it is illegal to go whale fishing....because there are so many whales in a state which is over 1000 miles from a shore.

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    1. LOL! At least that's one law no one needs to worry about breaking!

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  16. Ha!!! just "lay low." enjoyed... take care, slu

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    1. I'm keeping my head down, trying to avoid the feds :D

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  17. I hate it when people tell you what you can and can't believe in. What happened to freedom? Some laws are just dumb...

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    1. It is astounding what can crop up, but even more terrifying when someone tries to enforce them.

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  18. You should totally buy a mask & crowbar and go on a mischief spree. What do you have to lose at this point, you scofflaw!

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    1. If I'm going to go down, I suppose I should go down with a bang!

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  19. I think my favourite old law still on the books is one from Denmark - if the Öresund sea freezes, and a Swede walks over to Denmark, Danes are allowed to hit him with sticks. However, the law says nothing about Norwegians, so they are free to visit.

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    1. That's so unfair, none of our old laws let us hit people with sticks!

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  20. EVIL! Eeeeeeeeviiiiiillll! Oh not you, discriminatory laws or any law that tries to dictate non-harmful behavior are evil. But I don't think there's a statute of limitations on practicing Paganism, so there's probably still a warrant out for your arrest.

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    1. That's why I'm currently going by the name Tootsie McSausagewaffle and I'm not staying anywhere more than three nights. Precautions, ya know...

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  21. OMG, you should be put behind bars (not the chocolate ones) immediately, you're a danger to society :))

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    1. Chocolate bar, Martini bar, Roseanne Barr, all bars that are preferable to iron ones :D

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    2. Jean Marc Barr preferably :)
      http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xkvpdf2gxik/TaskfRqPJ4I/AAAAAAAAD8Y/dp-PoR5pO5c/s400/jean-marc-barr-.jpg

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  22. Hmmm. I'm wondering how many laws I am unknowingly breaking?! Probably a couple! Shhh... don't tell!

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    1. I have a sneaking suspicion we can't get out of bed in the morning without breaking at least one stupidly outdated law.

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  23. Here I am, once again consorting with an admitted felon. So I guess in some states, freedom of religion means you're free to choose whatever religion you want, but ohbytheway the dress code for that one is an orange jumpsuit.

    But wow, by your math I've now been blogging for over 300 years. Jeez, I feel so old (especially since I just said "jeez").

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    1. Hey, at least you didn't say "Dag nab it, by jingie crikie!" Then you'd really be old!

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  24. This is really funny but hard to believe at the same time. In which country do we live? Craziness. But you are really bad ;-)

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  25. Oh goodness, really. Well at least it seems the law caught up a few years back. I imagine sometimes they let updating those laws slide as they have other more pressing matters but it would be terrible if they tried to enforce them.

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    1. I guess all it takes is one person with a grudge...

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  26. How crazy! Are there still other religions that are illegal in Australia?

    I wonder if there could be old laws against people wearing flip flops in the freezing cold weather. I have no idea why, but that really annoys me and I'd like to press charges, please!

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    1. I'm not sure about wearing them in cold weather, but if someone wants to resurrect an old law about wearing them with socks, I'll happily support it!

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