It's weird, I know can be pretty careless with my budget from time to time but you'd think I'd remember buying that many human beings. Maybe it was another late night eBay debacle?
But according to this site, that's how many slaves work for me, and who am I to argue. After all, I answered their questionnaire, went through the whole rigmarole, and they gave me an honest answer. I can hardly hold them responsible when I can't handle the truth.
It doesn't seems fair, though, that I apparently own all these slaves and I don't get any of the perks one would assume comes with illegal slave ownership. Where's the scantily clad beautiful boys feeding me peeled grapes and fanning me with a palm leaf? Where's the bevy of nubile young things catering to my every whim while wearing togas?
Sorry, all my ideas of slavery were stolen from old Mel Brooks films.
But seriously, I have to admit that the results disturbed me. Apparently I'm below the average, which sits at 38, but even so 25 seems like an awful lot to me.
Just because I need these things, doesn't mean I can't make an effort to make sure that the products I'm buying are as slavery-friendly as possible. In some cases it's obviously more difficult, such as when slavery is used to produce or mine the raw materials that are then used to produce the goods. But that shouldn't excuse me from looking for alternatives.
Or at the very least, if the products I own are manufactured by slave labour surely I owe it to the people who made them to be aware of it.
So go check it out for yourself and see if your ranking comes back as better than mine. Who knows, you might learn something along the way. I know I did.
I am totally going to do it. I'm trying to live as compassionately as possible. But I ain't getting rid of my moisturizers. I will just have to make peace with the fact that I have at least 5 slaves.
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing it'd be impossible to have zero, given the way things are.
DeleteLAWD, do you know the slave labor involved in a cocoa bean harvest???? I must employ over 100 slaves with the amount of chocolate I ingest in a year!!!!
ReplyDeleteSee, I'd consider that a necessity. Chocolate is totally necessary, right?
DeleteIt's pretty disturbing. I whittled it down to 23 after doing their more detailed questionnaire (just the basic answers gave me 32...). But it also said that one of my biggest contributors was "towels," when I said I have two towels. I don't know if I am going to reduce my total towel ownership, although I guess I can look for free trade towels when the current ones finally go threadbare in a few years?
ReplyDeleteIt seems unlikely you'll be able to go without towels ... unless you invest in a loom, learn to weave, and then make your own.
DeleteI got 57. I think most of them came from pieces of jewelry that I inherited, so some of them probably only work for me indirectly. Either way, it's still disturbing.
ReplyDeleteIt is, isn't it! I only have one piece of diamond jewellery, but I'm sure it added significantly to my count. Apparently not as much as my conditioner though, which confuses me a little.
Delete"Piss Boy!" Who doesn't love Mel Brooks?
ReplyDeleteAnywho.. Evidently I have 49 slaves working for me.. mm'kay.. All due to mah gaming. and, sadly my children's underwear. yeeeah.. It said my children's underwear. So.. commando for them! Poor cold bottomed children! lol.
Oh dear, who knew there was such an enormous slave trade centred around the manufacturing of children's underpants! Maybe you should let them roam free as the good lord intended!
DeleteHOLY COW my survey said I have 67! WHAT??? I think it's because we have a 4-bedroom house plus an office. Don't I get points for having my mother-in-law live with me, hence she's not creating an entirely separate, slavery-encouraging environment? Geez. Or did they tack on a whole bunch of extra slaves just because I live in the U.S.? :-/ (Just kidding... sort of.)
ReplyDeleteMaybe, like me, you had an insomnia driven late night shopping spree and accidentally bought a bunch of slaves. At least I assume that's how it works.
DeleteI came up with 29. One of my biggest impacts? Underwear. Seriously. I own a lot of underwear. I actually did this twice once counting the kids and once without. With the kids my count came up to 45.
ReplyDeleteWho would have thought that underwear would have that much of an impact! Must be lots of slaves out there sewing underdacks.
DeleteWay to go to make me feel guilty. Apparently I've got 25 slaves and most of them are to do with Spawn's toys and clothes. At least I know now what I must do...get rid of Spawn.
ReplyDeleteIf anything, this might be good experience for Spawn with his world domination goals. He's got to learn how to rule his minions after all.
DeleteI liked and loathed this survey. Though I appreciate the intent to educate people as to their purchases, it was a generalization assuming no one looks into products they purchased. I wasn't given the ability to say I bought a locally grown and manufactured soap or that I have a certified blood-free diamond/metal engagement ring.
ReplyDeleteC'est la vie. Maybe we can eliminate the need for such surveys by society all agreeing not to be horrible to one another. Perchance to dream.
Oh, it was totally a generalisation. There's no way you could really work something like that out with a ten minute survey. I guess their goal was just to get people thinking about it.
DeleteGot a 33. Kinda feel like crap. Although! The only diamond I own is a conflict-free diamond so that should take off like, at least 32 of those points, right??
ReplyDeleteLOL! Maybe you should do it again and pretend you don't own the diamond, then see what score you get.
DeleteWow... This is a real eye opener... I have 42. I blame my kids though.
ReplyDeleteHugs!
Valerie
Absolutely, it's your girls' fault. You really should talk to them about not sneaking off to the slave auctions and buying up slaves like that.
DeleteSo apparently I own 50 slaves. In light of this, I've decided to stop driving my car, stop using soap, and I'm going to throw my wedding ring into the fires of mount doom. Would you care to join me?
ReplyDeleteWell, one does not simply walk into Mordor ,,, but between us we have seventy five slaves to carry us. I'm in!
DeleteI don't know how many "slaves" this survey would say I have, but I do know I have two slaves in my basement kniting me a sweater right now, and a third one cleaning out my chimney.
ReplyDeleteIs the one cleaning out the chimney a cockney urchin from the 1890's? I hope so, I'm pretty sure they're the only type of slave you're allowed to force up a chimney.
DeleteMost jobs I had in college could've been considered slave labor.
ReplyDeleteSomething in your article gave me pause, though...what the hell is makeup concealer? I mean, isn't stuff like blush and base supposed to be flesh-colored to begin with? Is this something the Invisible Woman would apply?
I thought you either put makeup on, or took it off.
LOL! Believe me, it's nothing as cool as that. It's just the stuff you put over the shadows on your face to make them disappear. Who knew that it involved so much slave labour though!
DeleteI hope you don't mind... I linked to this blog from my most recent blog.
ReplyDeleteOf course not! Spread the word ... spread that shit like it's nutella!
Delete