Saturday, July 27, 2013

The next time I have to go on the lam, I'm all set...

Source
You know, I don't think there's anyting you can't learn from the internet these days.  Want to know how to knit?  Watch a Youtube knitting tutorial [link]!  Don't know how to change a washer in the sink?  Go to eHow [link]!  Need to bathe your cat?  Well, CollegeHumor [link] has the answer to that one!

But I have to admit that I never thought I'd find this particular how-to available on the good old interwebs [link].  "How To Disappear Completely" ... sounds intriguing, no?

I have to admit, when I first read it I thought perhaps it was a "how to" on magic tricks.  Then when I realised that they meant disappear in the geographical sense rather than the mystical one, I was just amused.  I mean, how much information could really be in it?  Would it just be the rantings of some angsty teen on how to run away from home, or a compilation of TV crime show observations?

As it turns out though, there's quite a lot of scarily good advice in there.  Common sense points that someone who was considering going off the grid might not have previously thought of.  Things like the fact that leaving in the morning rather than the afternoon gives you a better chance to get further away before anyone notices, and that slowly transferring your money from digital to cash over a period of time won't immediately draw the same suspicion as taking it all out at once.

I suppose if I ever needed to disappear for any reason there are worse things I could read.  It's hardly a step by step, but it definitely brings up issues I might not have thought about on my own.

But as interesting and informative as it may be, I think I'll have to pass.  Remove yourself slowly from the internet by slowing your use of online accounts before eventually removing them?  Yeah, like that's going to happen!

32 comments:

  1. It's a fun fantasy, but I think it would take a long time to get enough cash to actually be able to live for very long. Of course, if you're going to rob a bank, and then disappear, I wonder how long the money would last. I bet there are websites devoted to living on very little money, so yes, it's all possible.

    Isn't is just "lam"? Or maybe you take a baby sheep along for company, and eventually a good dinner?

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    1. I think there are some countries where you can live like a king on very little money. That'd be my plan, get to one of those countries where I can have a five star life on fifteen dollars a day.

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  2. You'll have to write a character that disappears. And LOL I noticed your Ohiopyle Wilderness Voyageurs ad. This weeks blog post is about a trip to Ohiopyle and that was the rafting company we used.

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    1. LOL! Maybe a character who disappears, but people still keep running into him and don't seem to realise that he's trying to disappear?

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  3. That "how to wash your cat" video is hilarious. I swear the cat is yelling NOOOOOO in human.

    As far as being on a lamb versus being on the lam...I prefer not to do either. I suspect there are videos for both. Bestiality seems like it would have a big Internet presence.

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  4. I've always wondered what it would be like to simply withdraw from the world and disappear.

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    1. British members of parliament do it every year for about four months - on full pay.

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  5. I thought "going on the lamb" meant this post would be about bestiality. That would be a good reason to disappear from a former life alright!

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    1. LOL! I'd better be careful, I'll have the RSPCA knocking on the door.

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  6. Haven't really pondered this subject. Maybe I should.

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  7. My problem is not becoming invisible; my problem is getting noticed in the first place.

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  8. There are times I wish I could simply just run away...but these kids of mine would follow me no doubt about it.

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  9. I have the same problem as Stephen Hayes!

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    1. I wonder if you did everything on that site in reverse if that's solve the problem!

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  10. There are plenty of things you can do if you are trying to escape life in some form or another. Some of them make absolutely perfect sense while others are just so far out there they couldn't possibly work... but often times the most obvious stuff goes unnoticed.

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    1. That's true. I'm sure most people get found out because they overlook the obvious stuff.

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  11. withdraw from the internet...what....I don't understand!!!

    Maybe I need a how to video for that.

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  12. Disappearing is not my magic trick. . . . It's my ILLUSION!

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  13. Now, I truly wonder why anyone would want to go to so much trouble to disappear off the face of this earth. Could it be because they committed some heinous crime/s? or is it because they just want a peaceful holiday? Beats me. Maybe it's easier to just wear a wig and some big dark glasses, nobody will notice you, I swear... Oops, I just bashed my head into that lamp-post. I must get rid of those dark glasses.

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    1. I'd have to imagine the most common reason is overdue library books.

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  14. I have a considerable amount of debt, I think I can understand disappearing. I just assumed people moved to Alaska to disappear. Can't you just fake your death like that "Canoe Man" in England who faked his death so he and his wife could collect the insurance money?

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    1. You could just leave all your clothes on the beach I suppose ... but then you'd have to walk away naked. Awkward.

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  15. So you're saying just dropping your hat and coat at the edge of the swollen river isn't enough anymore? So much for my big Grande Finale. ;)

    S

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  16. Unless you wanted to pretend you were kidnapped. But I'm not sure why anyone would do that?

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    1. Getting chased by debt collectors for overdue video late fees? That's who I assume does it.

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