Many of you might not know this but back in the early days of bicycling, when cycling tours were all the rage and Mr Chips type characters would pedal around the countryside having picnics with young ladies while wearing three piece suits and bowler hats, bike seats were a little bit ... different. A woman would have more reason to go out cycling than to get from point A to point B, and it generally involved the letter O.
But then the modesty police got involved. Scandal! How dare women be roaming around the countryside having orgasms willy nilly. Only men were suppose to be able to find sexual gratification. What next, women deciding that they didn't need men after all as long as they had the early 1900's equivalent of a 10 speed? Wanting the vote? Wanting equal pay for equal work? Outrageous!
So the evil bicycle manufacturers created what they called a "hygienic" bike seat for ladies. Apparently hygienic translates to "nowhere near as much fun", so ladies had to say goodbye to their fresh air, exercise and copious quantities of orgasms.
But now a UK sex toy company as decided it's time to right that century old wrong, bless their hearts, by creating a new product they call "The Happy Ride" [link]. For the bargain price of thirty seven bucks you can become the proud new owner of a vibrating bicycle seat which is equipped with multiple speed settings. They do warn though that it gives off a "light humming" sound when in use.
Then again, what with the sound of traffic all around you I doubt anyone would notice.
I'm not sure what this will mean for road safety or bicycle related accident statistics, but right now I'm having a hard time caring. It's a freaking vibrating bike seat, people!
What a wonderful time to be alive!