Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Because life's too short to spend time running a hot piece of metal over your unmentionables...

I'm pretty sure I own an iron. You might not realise it from the state of my clothes, but it's around here somewhere. There's a cardboard box in the laundry I haven't searched in a while, maybe it's in there.

The ironing board though, well that's a tricky one.  The last time I saw it I was using it to prop up the steam mop (also M.I.A.).  That was about six months ago, so god only knows what's happened to it since then.

But really, it's not surprising I don't know where they are.  I don't iron. My tea towels get folded in whatever state they come off the line, my sheets go on the bed rough dried, and my clothes are purchased for both their comfort and their declarations of not requiring ironing.

I know, it's utter blasphemy for someone who loves cleaning porn as much as I do, but I just can't help it.  Ironing is one of those chores which, despite my best efforts, I can't seem to make fun.  And believe me, I've tried!  But there's only so many After Dinner Mints you can bribe yourself with before you're sick to your stomach with half a basket of ironing still left.

I guess you could say I have a love/hate relationship with ironing. When I was a wee little thing, that's how I earned most of my pocket money. A cent for hankies, two for tea towels and pillow cases, five for clothing and ten for sheets. Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure that qualifies as child slavery.

I should look up the statute of limitations on something like that.

I suppose I could just cut the crap, be a grown up, and iron the damned shirt, but I like to think that I'm taking a stand against misrepresentation in the clothing industry. They told me I wouldn't have to iron those shirts. I didn't iron those shirts. Sure, I may look like a really big shar pei, but a gal's got to put her foot down somewhere.

102 comments:

  1. Haha, good one! I hate ironing too. Most of my clothes are of the kind that don't need ironing as well.

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    1. I always try to pick my clothes to be as non-irony as possible.

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  2. Love it. I also hate ironing, but that is not all I hate. My husband used to tell people that if a button fell off his shirt, he might as well throw it away. I hate sewing too.

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    1. LOL! I'm not much of a sewer, but I do try. Unfortunately, my repairs look a little strange.

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  3. UGH ironing is the worst. I will actually spray my clothes with a squirt bottle of water and put them back int he dryer over ironing. it's just such a pain in the neck. If only spraying them with a squirt bottle and putting them back in the dryer actually worked...

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  4. I don't really mind ironing. There's something about taking the wrinkles out of something, leaving it crisp, that appeals to me. Kinda like vacuuming a really dirty floor. :-)

    I'm all about the gratification. :-)

    Pearl

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    1. Maybe that's the problem, I'm not fussed about vacuuming either ;p

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  5. I am such a laundry nerd. Send your ironing my way.

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  6. I can't remember the last time I ironed. Most of the clothes we own are the wrinkle free, non-iron type as well. And the ones that aren't...oh well. It's usually so hot and steamy here, everything unwrinkles as soon as you walk out the door anyway. :)

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    1. LOL! The secret to an iron free life, moving to the tropics.

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  7. I only iron when I'm quilting, and that's because it's a necessary part of the process. I also haven't quilted in years, so I have no idea where my iron is at this point. Everything we wear is used as is, wrinkles and all.

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  8. I don't iron. It's been one of my mother's great lament, along with my lack of really loud brightly patterned old lady clothing, of my wardrobe. When she gets really frustrated she just takes the clothes she can find and irons them for me and hangs them up very proud of herself. I then proceed to wear and wrinkle and hang them back up. Works for me and eventually I think she'll get bored but I'm a few years from 40 and it hasn't happened yet so maybe not.

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    1. LOL! Mothers are like that I suppose. If I leave mine alone in my house I'm very likely to find the cupboards reorganised.

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  9. i don't iron...i don't think I have ironed since 2005!!

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  10. I haven't ironed a piece of clothing in 10 years. I think my iron is in one of the closets around here somewhere, and the board is gawd only knows where. I don't iron like i don't do windows. You are wise to not do it. Many (many) more valuable ways to spend our time on this planet. :D

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  11. I Have an ironing board. I know exactly where it is. It's just still in its' plastic wrapper!

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  12. So weird. My sis and I were just talking about ironing this past weekend. She looovvvveeess to iron - weird, I know - and I'm like you. I buy my clothes that need no irong at all!

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  13. There are certain things in life I won't do - and one of them is ironing. Hate it with all my being

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    1. My philosophy is the wrinkles will drop out eventually, so what's the point.

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  14. Thanks for the laugh Kellie... that really was funny... cleaning porn! I'll now be looking differently at my iron and ironing board.

    Dare I say... (ducking so I won't get hit with any flying irons) that I like ironing - I do some of my best writing (aka dictating) while wielding an iron, and that goes for washing dishes too. Yes, call me a freak, I've heard it all before. :P :P hahaha

    Cheers, Jenny @ PEARSON REPORT

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    1. I'm a huge fan of cleaning porn. I can read cleaning and housekeeping magazines for hours!

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  15. I hate hAtE HATE ironing! I avoid it like the plague. And on those rare occasions when I absolutely have no choice but to iron (which happens once every 10 years or so), I become hostile. And my family is afraid of me...hahaha... I'm not sure what's behind such resentment of this chore, but there it is. I make sure to never buy clothing that needs ironing. Never! EVER.

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    1. I figure the wrinkles will go away eventually, no point in ironing.

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  16. Erma Bombeck's children were born before permanent press, but she had her own solution. She would sprinkle whatever needed ironing, roll it up & put it in the refrigerator. Eventually, all the kids moved out!!

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  17. I never iron!! I just throw my clothes in the drier like a respectable lazy person!

    Hugs!

    Valerie

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    1. I'd do that too but I don't have a dryer. I guess I'll have to stay wrinkled.

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  18. Wait...you have ta towels? I think my disdain for ironing comes from the simple fact that I am just not very good at it! I iron new creases into shirts and the tablecothes never look much better.

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    1. I'm okay at it (what with all the practice as a child), but I just can't bring myself to do it anymore.

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  19. I haven't ironed anything in years. YEARS. It's so liberating!

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  20. I earned money this way as a kid, too. I even ironed the pillow cases and Mom's slips!! (We didn't have a dryer). Avoid ironing today...but still iron occasionally.

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  21. I totally agree, ironing sucks... I use the dryer (or go hobo, lol).

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    1. I've never heard of the dryer method! A lot of people seem to prefer it though.

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  22. I never iron! I just throw things back in the dryer if necessary!

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  23. I'm sure there's an iron hidden around our house someplace, but I have no idea where.

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  24. My iron lives in the bathtub. I never use it, cant see the point. Mother on the other hand irons everything. I cant believe we are related.

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    1. Electrical equipment in the bathtub? I'm pretty sure that's a bad idea.

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  25. Things always look more wrinkled AFTER I've ironed them, so there's no point. I had to put in a real effort last week though, as Spawn complained that he was fed up with going to school looking like a hobo...meh, that's been my look for the last 30 years. :)

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    1. You mean he doesn't want to take after you by looking like a hobo? Shocking!

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  26. All my clothes are "wash and wear", regardless of what the label says.

    S

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  27. Just spritz them with a mist of water while on the hanger. They will dry sans wrinkles while you do something else. Something more fun, something productive. If that doesn't work, grab a different shirt if you are so inclined. Forget the iron and ironing board.

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    1. I've just developed a very selective blindness when it comes to wrinkles.

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  28. In order to get out of ironing, I always make sure I get the clothes out of the drier before (or immediately upon when) it turns off.

    And failing that, I wear wrinkly clothes.

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    1. I've just accepted that most of the time I'm going to be crumpled. It's not so bad when you get used to it.

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  29. I prefer to let other people iron out my wrinkles.

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  30. I opened my ironing board the other day because it was a dire emergency and the damn thing had dry rot. Uh Yea, it had been a few years.

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    1. LOL! I'm always genuinely worried about the electrics in mine when I dig it out for the ironing emergency I inevitably have every six months or so.

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  31. You have a label called "cleaning porn." I'm not sure we're meant to be friends.

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    1. Cleaning porn is the best! There's nothing quite like reading illicit cleaning tips, how to get stains out, what chemicals to use on grouting, while having absolutely no intention of actually doing any of those thing.

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  32. I love ironing... I know, I'm weird. Ironically (haha, get it) I hate laundry. I have a lot if clothes that require ironing, so yes, I iron, but it is the clothes I really like, so it puts me on a good mood.

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  33. My grandma tells tales of staying up until 2:00am to iron all of the cotton clothing and linens when she was a young mom. Ironing is in my blood. I am very good at it. People think I take my husband's clothes to the cleaners to be pressed. However, anyone that sees my kids at school knows I do not enjoy the ironing. Husband's clothes are the only things that get ironed, and I only do it because he is AWFUL at it, and I can't stand to see the improper creases he puts into the clothes.
    Ironing is overrated.

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    1. My mum's pretty obsessive about the ironing, and I think my grandmother was the same way. Maybe it's a generational thing where it's getting weaker with each descendent?

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  34. Glad I'm not the only one who hates it. I do iron, but only when absolutely necessary. I can remember the days of sprinkling them with water, rolling them up for a half hour or so then ironing. What an absolute pain!

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    1. It definitely seems to be the consensus around here that ironing isn't anyone's favourite chore.

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  35. I hate ironing, too! I 'iron' my clothes by throwing them in the dryer with a wet towel while I'm taking my shower. I get out, get my clothes, and they are all set to wear. And for the record, I would never, ever iron my sheets, even if I liked ironing. That just makes no sense to me. You can't even see them!

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    1. A lot of people say they use the dryer trick. It makes me wish I owned a dryer.

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  36. Hahaha, that why I looovve the new crushed fabric look that many items of clothing seem to come in now!!
    Says a girl who er, um, irons the pillow-cases.......only when visitors are coming of course ;)

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    1. LOL! Maybe I'll just start telling people that my clothes are supposed to look like that!

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  37. Ironing boards are a great surface to wrap presents on. Fact.

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  38. If it's a non-iron shirt, you need to stand strong. I would go so far as to sue the company for making that claim and causing you mental anguish from those who would mock a person who didn't iron a non-iron shirt.
    Also, is ironing pillow cases something people do? I've not heard of this. Don't we all have giant heads that then wrinkle the pillow?

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    1. I always found it a bit strange, but then I was getting paid so it wasn't like I was going to say anything.

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  39. I don't even know where my iron is. In fact I never know where it is to the point that I went out and bought a second iron so I'd have one in storage and one handy. Now there are TWO irons I don't know where they are.

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    1. LOL! And as soon as you buy a third, you'll suddenly find the other two ;D

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  40. I haven't used an iron in the longest time. And I think all three of us in my house have one...we just don't know where!

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    1. I'm starting to think it's a feature they build into them. You buy an iron, take it home, then it immediately goes missing.

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  41. Throw it in the dryer with a damp cloth; gets wrinkles out! That's my version of ironing :)

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  42. When I read the title I interpreted "unmentionables" as something ummm... else. So I was like "Dear god why would you do that!"

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  43. I'm in the "wet washcloth+dryer=iron" camp. Although I have to admit that I do own an iron and use it on occasion. Mainly to iron-on patches and letters to sports gear and iron seams when I'm sewing clothes. Once I've made them, though, all bets are off!

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    1. LOL! Well as long as it's only for that, I suppose you can stay in the "Don't Iron" club.

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  44. When I was a kid I used to BEG my mum to let me do the ironing (all my friends did it for their parents and got pocket money for it and I hated to miss out) and she wouldn't let me, didn't trust me with the iron. Maybe if she HAD, I would like ironing now. As it is, I probably get the iron out once every few months for a stubborn wrinkle... and then I struggle to actually IRON.

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    1. But hey, plus side! If your mother ever complains about it, you can just tell her it's all her fault for not encouraging you when you were a kid.

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  45. Ha! Love it! I know where my iron is, but I can guarantee you it is covered in an Inch of dust!!! I also don't buy clothes that absolutely needs to be ironed. No cotton blouses or linen for me! I also kinda want to know what cleaning porn is? Lol

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    1. Ah cleaning porn is that delightfully guilty pleasure you get from reading cleaning tips or watching those home cleaning shows on TV, knowing damned well you're never going to do any of those things yourself.

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  46. Ironing! ::shudders:: I don't even own an iron, which shocks my mother, who irons the hell out of everything (her *underwear*, for heaven's sake!!!). I do own a travel-sized steaming device, though I rarely employ it.
    Some Dark Romantic

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  47. I recently gave my iron and the board away. Weirdly, I'd never owned one until I got married and (my husband) thought we needed one. Of course he never used it, either. Because as you said...life is too short. And if my clothes are that high-maintenance, they are not going to hold up to my everyday life at all.

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    1. I can go months or even a year without having to look for the iron, but if I ever gave it away you just know that'd be the day I desperately needed it.

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  48. I am by no means a clean freak, but I like things freshly pressed. I have NO idea why! I actually agree with you that life is too short. Yet, I can't seem to help myself!

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    1. I suppose I shouldn't poke fun. I'm a bit like that about washing dishes.

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  49. I am totally the other side of the coin - I iron everything (like a mad woman, yes!), including underwear and tea towels....Sorry to let the side down!

    Kate x
    Kate at Home

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  50. I actually like to iron! It's relaxing! I even iron pillowcases. I think I got it from my dad who was in the air force. Lord knows, my mom hated ironing ~ so it was my dad who taught me how to iron and to sew on buttons!

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    1. I will say this for ironing, it does seem to make things smaller so they take up less room in the cupboard.

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  51. I've never met a wrinkle I couldn't blame on the car ride.

    My mother laughed when we built our house and included a built-in ironing board in the laundry room. "You don't iron!" she said. "It's for re-sale value," I told her. LOL. Ironing is my version of hell.

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  52. I got rid of my ironing board as I use that ironing spray that helps take the wrinkles out, and on top of that I only have clothes that don't need ironing.

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