Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Tales from the bachelorette party...

... From the table at the bar.
Sue: (waving the newly unwrapped riding crop around) Really guys, you shouldn't have... 
Jane: It was nothing. 
Me: We wanted to get you something practical. Something you could use. 
Mary: You mean she has a horse? 
Jane and Me: (together, grinning) No. 
Mary: (eyes widening) Ohhhhh.... 
Sue: No, I really mean it. You shouldn't have! I'm going to have to carry this thing around with me all night! In the city! People are going to point and stare! 
Me: Well, that was kind of the point. This IS your batchelorette party, a little ritualistic humiliation is to be expected. 
Jane: Just be thankful you're not a guy, otherwise you might be naked and handcuffed to a streetlight by now. 
Mary:  ... remind me not to invite you lot to my batchelorette party. 
And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why my friends and I shouldn't be allowed to pick out presents for bachelorette parties.

Actually, we shouldn't be allowed to pick out presents for any occasion.  One friend never really forgave us for buying her a large, lifelike looking dildo as a going away gift.  But she was moving to the country!  And she was single!  And I knew FOR A FACT that she didn't have one already!

Really, we were just acting in her best interests.  Any amusement we felt at her embarrassment as she opened it at her going away party was purely circumstantial.


  1. I am fairly certain those friends that say "you shouldn't have" followed it up with the thought (to themselves, of course) "but I am glad you did."

  2. With that giant dildo story, I disagree, you and your friends are the best gift givers.
    But did you give her the ball gag that naturally accompanies a riding crop?

  3. Did the riding crop or dildo come (bad choice of words) with a gift receipt?

  4. Well, this certainly kicks things down a notch or two. Pretty soon you'll have to put an adult warning here. Mind you, I'd still read it. As a senior Bear, I'm still an adult.

    Blessings and Bear hugs!

  5. Do you and your friend do other types of parties too?

    I imagine the gifts are always just the right touch.

  6. You can pick out my gifts any time! Lol.. ;)

  7. You showed a lot of restraint. I can think of MUCH more embarrassing presents to give in public.

  8. My birthday is coming up in June. I've always wanted a ball gag! Or an iTunes gift card, that'd be okay too. Hehe!

  9. Those type of parties can go off the scale sometimes. And the next day is always full of embarrassment!

  10. Thanks for this information.If you are in charge of planning for a hen party for a close friend or relative.

    hen do london & hen parties in london

  11. I just stumbled upon your blog and wanted to say that I have really enjoyed reading your blog posts. Any way I'll be subscribing to your feed and I hope you post again soon.A fantastic presentation. Very open and informative.You have beautifully presented your thought in this blog post. Bachelorette Parties