Saturday, September 14, 2013
It works for labradors, I'm sure it'll work for you too...
Well now there's a solution!
The Pavlov Poke [link], invented by two MIT PHD candidates, is a revolutionary new method for treating online addiction ... and by revolutionary, I mean archaic and just begging for a lawsuit. Because the poke they mention in the name of the product? Yeah, that'd be an electrical shock that is given to the "client" when they've spent too much time at a particular site.
The inventors decided to create the device when they realised that they were spending 50 plus hours a week on Facebook. That's a huge amount of time! I don't think I have 50 hours I could find spare to spend on something like that, and I know about wasting time on online sites. I was a World of Warcraft player for gods sake, and I didn't play on there for 50 hours a week.
Is this what we've come to? Being connected to the human equivalent of a dog shock collar to try and stop us from spending too much time online? Electrocuted to stop us from wasting our days away "liking" pictures of cute cats and "poking" our friends?
Oh well, I suppose if there's a market, and people are going to pay, why the hell not.
I did have to laugh at their original attempt to quit though. Before they came up with the device, they experimented with having a friend regularly call them and yell at them over the phone if they'd spent too much time on the site. Hmm, humiliation, pain, I'm starting to see a pattern here.
Guys, you might just want to bite the bullet and hire a Dominatrix. No need to make up these excuses about "internet addiction". I hear that Harvard has a really good club [link], just incase you were interested.