Take the recent election for example. Here in Australia voting is compulsory, they mark your name of a great big list as they hand you your ballot paper and if at the end of the day your name is still there, you get hit with a fifty dollar fine ... at least I think it's still fifty dollars.
Fifty dollars for the convenience of not having to find a parking spot, elbow my way through the people handing out leaflets, and then line up for god knows how long just to write the number 1 on a piece of paper? It was tempting. I guess everything has a price.
For example, want to know how much it will cost to fondle your dangly bit in public on a bus? Exactly one hundred and eighty pounds, apparently. At least that's what a Bletchley senior citizen had to pay when he was caught "shampooing his privates" on a public bus [link].
And no, that's not a euphemism for something else, he actually was shampooing his privates.
Apparently he was feeling a bit sensitive in the nether region and, with no ointment to put on, he decided to see if shampooing it would do the trick. Although it does bring up the question, why did he have the shampoo with him? And where on earth did he get water from?
Unfortunately, a woman and her child saw him and got a bit upset, resulting in his being charged with public indecency and having to pay the hundred and eighty quid.
I suppose if what he said was true, and he was just trying to stop an itch (again, not a euphemism), then you have to feel sorry for the guy. Who hasn't had those awkward, irritating itches that you want nothing more than to scratch, but you know that if you do it in public everyone will look at you as if you just killed a bucket load of kittens by bludgeoning them with a puppy? And he said he tried to be discreet, he just not discreet enough apparently.
Hell, if this was a storyline in an episode of Seinfeld, you know as well as I do that it would have been hilarious!