Saturday, August 31, 2013

I hope my neighbour realises I wasn't hitting on him...

The other day my neighbour came to my door to ask me something.  It wasn't anything particularly interesting or worth noting here, just your run of the mill neighbourly conversation.  The only reason I'm even bringing it up is because, when he thanked me, I replied with "Oh honey, that's fine".

Yep, I've become that person.

I've become the woman who calls passing acquaintances "honey".  You all know the type I'm talking about, they grate on you with their overly familiar terms of endearment and vaguely patronising manner, while you just know the only reason they're calling you that is either because they've forgotten what your name actually is, or because they want to impress on you just how young, naive and stupid you are.

It's the female version of when a guy calls someone "pal" or "buddy"

 Poor bloke, he didn't seem offended by my slip of the tongue, but I could tell he was a bit taken aback.  Did he think I was being condescending?  Or worse, hitting on him?  He was nice enough to just ignore it, and its not like we're the sort of neighbours who are in and out of each other's houses, so I suppose it's not really an issue.  It'll blow over, and next time I'll just have to try and restrain myself from calling him "darling" or something equally embarrassing.

When I really thought about it though, I realised this isn't a new development.  I've been calling friends pet names for years.  A "dear" here, a "sweetheart" there, it all seems so innocent until you find yourself talking to the guy at the service station like he's your husband.

I did think about stopping, quitting cold turkey, but if I'm being completely honest I'm not sure I really want to stop.  There's something nice about using those terms with the people you love to bits, especially when they don't even blink at it, they just say one back at you.

Maybe I just need to stop fighting the inevitable.  I'm an endearment user, and the sooner I accept that the better.

So if you ever meet me and I call you "honey", just go with it. I promise I'm not coming on to you.

47 comments:

  1. I'm an endearment user too, darling! I'm offended by pet names just when they are used by people I can't stand. Basically I use a lot of "tesoro" here and there but in a sweet sort of way, at least that's my intention.
    With love,
    Coco
    xoxo
    Coco et La vie en rose
    Coco et La vie en rose on Bloglovin
    Coco et La vie en rose on Facebook

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My go-to term seems to be sweetie. It's very Doctor Who, now that I think about it.

      Delete
  2. It bothers me when a salesclerk or waiter calls me "honey"!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't mind as long as they're wearing a hair net. It feel like they should go together to me.

      Delete
  3. Dearie and Lovie drive me up the wallie.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't mind them, but I have to admit I prefer it if they're said in a broad Yorkshire accent.

      Delete
  4. I'm good with any pet name, just don't call me Ma'am.

    I used to have a co-worker who was so firmly in the habit of saying "love you" at the end of all family phone conversations that she would occasionally say it to sales reps as well. Maybe that's why they preferred talking to her over me...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't mind being called Ma'am ... at least behind closed doors ;P

      Delete
  5. that's freakin' cool. i've had ladies do that occasionally and i can tell it is just their personality and how they were raised coming out. i wish more gals would do that!

    ReplyDelete
  6. No, don't stop! I think it is nice.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe we should have an International Endearments Day, and we can all call each other as many little names as we like!

      Delete
  7. A good one to use is the British term "duckie" -- clearly an endearment but not one with any emotional/sexual overtones beyond that. If you MUST use something, of course.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Go ahead and use it, come on or not. Life's too short to worry about this stuff--that is until people stop coming on to you completely.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm good with any name too - just don't call me auntie or "tannie" (the Afrikaans equivalent)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The only one I can't stomach is "girlie", it's a hard one for someone to pull off without sounding insulting.

      Delete
  10. Down here in KY, that term is used in every other sentence :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. I would personally welcome it. As it is every year more and more people are calling me MISTER Park. DOH! That was my DAD's name.

    S

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL! I suppose I'd be the same way if people were calling me Ma'am ... well, I'm sure there are some circumstances I wouldn't mind it in ;P

      Delete
  12. I way prefer Honey to douchebag!

    Actually in New Jersey, a state which is famous for our Diners and foul smelling air, if the waitress doesn't call you Honey at the Diner it does not have that same "Diner" experience.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't think I'll be adding douchebag to my list of endearments.

      Delete
  13. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hahahahaha! You should have been at the warehouse home repair store with me when I causually said to a male employee- That's nice dear. It was in no way a condescending reply, just more along the lines of mentioning he was sweet for pointing something out to me. Sure made his head spin though and gave my friend and I quite the laugh afterwards.

    Sorry I had to correct my spelling.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I am an endearment user as well. My niece and nephew are referred to as "snuggly". As in, "How's my snuggly today?" (They're 25 and 22 years old.) :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh gawd, I'm doing it too! And although I'm way further on in years than you - is it an age thang!??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can't imagine what I'll be like by the time I'm in my 70's then!

      Delete
  17. I don't even get "darling" from my wife. I'd probably welcome it from my neighbour.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Well, Sweet Cheeks, I don't see anything wrong with it.

    ReplyDelete
  19. That took me a while to get used to after moving from California to Atlanta. Now I kinda like it.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I like to call the people and animals closest to me some form of the word "pie". I've said, "Momma-Pie", "Smokey-Pie", "Tori-Pie", god knows what else. Whenever the word "pie" gets overused, I turn to other creative pet names like "Molly Dolly", "Saggy Maggie", "Tortellini", and "Luna-Tuna". Pet names are nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, I wish I'd get called "honey" more often! ^_^

    ReplyDelete
  21. You know who else is an endearment user? Mel Gibson. That's why he called that police officer "Sugar Tits". It was just his way of expressing affection. Maybe you need to up your game from "honey" and "darling" to something less matronly, like "anal bead" or "methadone" or don't take my advice ever.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I was raised in the South and grew up with "darlin" and "honey" so I wouldn't of thought twice about it. However, I tend never to use endearments myself to anyone other than my family. I don't know why exactly....it feels odd to me. I would think it might be fun to call someone "Sugar Tits" as Pickleope suggested but probably not a cop.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I am with Cherly on this, here in the south honey, darlin, hon, sweetie it's all good. It's definitely a well spread southern trait were I am from. I have had one person in my 30 years get mad at me over it and he was more mad at the fact that he was forced to stand in line (the wrong one I may add) for a few extra minutes resulting in someone else getting that $1 scratch off he wanted. I blame it on his age.

    There are certain endearments that only my family get though, honey and sweetie mainly. Hon is left for people I know well enough and is usually said when goign there you hon or that's okay hon.

    I say keep the honey and throw in a few more terms to keep him on his toes.

    ReplyDelete
  24. My husband calls me from work if someone younger than him calls him 'honey,' he hates it with a passion and it makes me laugh. I think I'll call someone honey the next time we're out just to amuse myself. :)

    hehehe

    Does your neighbor read your blog? hahahahah Kidding. :)

    Thanks for linking to Super Sunday Sync!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Haha I do this all the time, I once almost called my boss 'babe' which would have been horrific x

    ReplyDelete
  26. Some people get away with it and with others it grates with no reason.

    Same as Shaz or Shazza. Most of the time I hate it but then there are some people who can call me Shaz and it doesn't bother me.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'm from Texas... Not a big deal down here. Pretty common, in fact. Heck, I'm guilty. As you mention, I call a lot of people, whether I know them or not, Buddy. I also refer to a lot of guys as Dude. I also put a 'ster' on a lot of the female names I come in contact with. My wife has a good friend that comes around. Her name is Peggy. To me, she's the Peggster.

    I stand before you: Guilty as Charged!!! Tar & Feather me. Slu

    ReplyDelete
  28. Strangely enough I have not gotten used to saying honey or dear. In my own language I end up using terms of endearment even for strangers.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Hi I find myself doing the same thing I guess it just depends on where your from and the habits of the people around you. Found you through the sunday social lorraine at http://lorrainesresources.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  30. I greet my husband each morning with "Good morning SWEET DARLING" but I am more carefull using those terms to others! I enjoyed your darling post

    ReplyDelete