When, exactly, did it become okay to go to a stranger's home, somewhere you haven't even been invited to, and then ask them to hand over cash? Why should I have to be worried about being bailed up for my last red cent in my own home?
At least when you see them in the shopping centre you have a chance of escaping. If you don't make eye contact, stay as far to the side of the lane as you can and, if possible, throw small children and elderly people in their way, you can avoid them. But when they come to your front door it's like you're being held to ransom by a very pushy, incredibly judgy blackmailer.
The other day some girl came to my door to collect for the save-the-spotted-owl-protect-the-rain-forest-knit-little-jumpers-for-the-baby-seals society and I had to say sorry, but I didn't have any money on me. I mean really, who even carries actual cash these days!
Now I'd normally be more than happy to hand over a couple of dollars in the name of a worthy cause, but it just wasn't going to happen that day.
Not that this girl saw it that way. Oh no, she cast me a look like "What do you mean you don't have any change? Do you want the little animals to die? Do you! DO YOU!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WHY!!!"
My response was to tell her that I'd be happy to donate online if she'd give me the website. That's my standard response to people who come door to door. Generally I've found that people willing to give you a website actually want you donation, but people who say "Oh, we don't have one, we only accept door to door" are just trying to get you to sign up to one of those schemes where you end up paying them fifty bucks every month for the rest of your life or until you get wise and shut down your bank account.
Take a guess at which method she went with.
So she went away disappointed, and I felt mildly violated in my own home.
Seriously, whippable offense!
