Saturday, October 26, 2013

My presence in a mall is a sign of the apocalypse...


If you know anything about me, you'll know that I'm not a shopper.

 Actually, that's an understatement ... I'm perhaps the world's worst shopper.  I'm impatient, I lose my temper if I don't find what I want right off, and I've been known to make innocent little shop assistants cry with my sarcastic comments and temper tantrums.  I believe they still tell stories about me at some of the larger centres.

It's like I'm an urban legend!

The reason I bring this up (yes, there actually IS a reason) is because yesterday I found myself with a friend out shopping.  Don't ask me how I got there, I'm not completely certain. All I know is suddenly there I was, wandering through kitchen stores looking for a baking timer! This was completely unprecedented.  And even scarier, I didn't lose my temper once!

I'm starting to worry myself now. Kellie going shopping and not hating it? Kellie wandering around in a shopping centre for the better part of a day and not wanting to rip someone's lungs out through their nostrils? It's something that's never happened to me before and I'm sure how to deal with it. Am I becoming what I hate? Am I becoming a shopper?

I suppose it's possible. I wandered around that place like a pro. I meandered through shops and checked out prices like I was going to buy something, but without any real intention of buying anything. Isn't that what recreational shoppers do? Oh no, please tell me I'm not becoming a recreational shopper! I might as well go stake out a corner of the food court right now if that's what's happening!

No, it's got to be a one off occurrence. I couldn't become a shopper, not at this late date. Don't most shoppers start pretty young, like in their early teens? I'm not practised enough, I'd never make it into the shopper Olympics. Most of the time I can't make it through an hour's trip to pick up groceries.

Maybe it was just something in the air?  A random occurrence that will never happen again. I'll just go back to the way things were before where I'd perform hit-and-run missions on the shops when I needed anything and looked sulky when other people dragged me there. Yep, it's going to be fine.

... oh god, please don't let me be turning into a shopper!

28 comments:

  1. Can you pick me up a loaf of bread?

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  2. Next thang ya know you are gonna be on that Super Shopper TV show.

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  3. I used to love to shop--now it's online only for me!!

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    1. Now that's one type of shopping I can get behind! Shopping that you can do in the nude!

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  4. I hate to shop...guy thing, except at Home Depot then I can spend hours...guy thing.

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  5. Relax....it won't stick.

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  6. I'm not a shopper, but it's fun to go shopping with The Hurricane. An occasional pleasant shopping experience won't turn us into hardcore shoppers.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. I think I'm more of a "Sunday Shopper", no stress, no crowds.

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  7. Like you I also hate shopping. But your new interest in it won't last...until you get hungry.

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  8. I used to shop A LOT, but now with bad feet, the concrete floors at the malls makes me stop after only an hour. Yes, I used to shop for 3-4 hours... don't hate me for being a shopper. Besides, I was supporting the economy!

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  9. Hahahaha.. And this is why I classify myself as a "buyer" NOT a shopper. I know what I'm getting, I get in and get out - especially in malls!

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    1. That's an excellent distinction to make! Maybe I'll start calling myself a buyer.

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  10. I shop from my recliner and UPS delivers. I hate shopping. Of course, prior to Fibromyalgia I enjoyed shoe shopping like there was no tomorrow but not any more. I hope you're not turning into a shopper. I'll say extra prayers for you tonite..lol

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  11. I am not a shopper either. Hate it. Just yesterday I was thinking that I need to start 'shopping' online so everything arrives in time for Christmas.

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    1. Ooh, I should really get onto that too. It's almost November!

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  12. It's going to be okay. Just breathe deeply. Occasionally we all have wants and needs and it requires our presence in the world of commerce. You're not a "shopper", you're a "consumer". It's what the economy requires. Everything will be okay. Now, if you start posting about "super cute" anything that you just bought, then you have a problem.

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    1. Thanks Pickleope, I knew I could trust you to talk me down from the ledge.

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  13. I have a new fondness for shoes - so have learnt to appreciate shopping for shoes :)

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    1. LOL! Well each to their own, I suppose. Personally, I'd go barefoot every day if it was socially acceptable.

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  14. As one non-shopper to another, I am sure this one time pleasant experience will be replaced at some point by a pushy crowd or a nasty sale's clerk and you will be back on the solid ground of "shopping sucks". If there was a drive through option at major department stores, I would drive through and say, "give me whatever size 7.5 shoe that is on sale".

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