Friday, June 7, 2013

So many Monopoly related deaths could have been avoided, if only we'd known...

So, it turns out my entire childhood is based on a lie.

All these years, and we've all been playing Monopoly wrong [link].  Can you believe it?  I never had a clue, but it turns out there's a rule that says if the person who lands on a spot doesn't want to buy it, the place should be auctioned off to the highest bidder.

Hour upon hour, sitting around that god forsaken monopoly board, watching as my piece hopped right over Mayfair while every other player landed on it and refused to buy.  And now it turns out I could have had it if I wanted to!

I feel as if I've been betrayed, Hasbro.

How did none of us ever realise we were playing that god damned game wrong all these years?  Did no one bother to read the rules?  Okay, so it's not like I read them either, but surely someone at some point saw that rule and thought, "Hmm, maybe we should start playing this way.  If we do, we'll probably be finished in time for dinner instead of some time next Thursday".

What are we going to find out next?  That the left hand right foot part of Twister was meant to be a suggestion rather than law?  That correct spelling wasn't necessary in Scrabble?  That Hungry Hungry Hippo was meant to be about skill and dexterity rather than mashing that little lever as hard and as fast as we possibly could?

I just ... I feel like the carpet's been pulled out from under my feet.  A world where a game of Monopoly can be finished in an hour?

This is going to take some getting used to.

101 comments:

  1. OMG! So if you landed on a property u could not afford you could have a bidding war to keep someone else from getting a monopoly? I am thunderstruck!!

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  2. Never did like that rotten game.

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  3. I actually read that rule and mentioned it to my family once back in the day, but no one wanted to play that way. I haven't played Monopoly since.

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    1. And why would you, knowing that it could take a week to finish!

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  4. WHOA now that's incentive to buy up all of those pricey Boardwalk properties.

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  5. my husband follows that rule, because he's the jerk that reads the entire booklet before each game. no one likes playing with him though, so i'd say skip the rule. :)

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    1. LOL! I must admit the best games I ever played were the ones where ALL the rules were made up.

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  6. LOL you can play the official rules or house rules and depending on when you landed on the coveted property no one had enough money to go to an auction anyway. We never auctioned off the pieces but knew we could.

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  7. First of all, crap. That would have helped. Second of all, I'm more annoyed by the Free Parking rule. How many times was I about to win because my brother ran out of money, when he landed on that free parking space and grabbed up a bunch of cash?? According to the article, that's not a rule either. Dagnabbit. So many hours of childhood wasted.

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    1. I don't thin I ever heard of the "free parking" rule. I guess that's one we did read the rules for.

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  8. If you go bust does the government bail you out and bill everybody else?

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  9. OMG I'm going to find my board right now and make up for all those lost games!

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    1. It is tempting to play a game with that rule and see if it makes a big difference, isn't it.

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  10. Or maybe I should have said games lost!!

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  11. I never knew that. WTH?

    I have had a game of Chutes and Ladders go into triple overtime and lasted longer than an hours and a half. Seriously. EVERYONE kept landing on the square for the damn long slide and ending up back at the start. It ended when everyone got bored and called it off.

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    1. I remember having a marathon game of Backgammon once ... man, that one was vicious.

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  12. wait and you don't get free cash???? I don't know if I want to play that any more. What is next snakes and ladders was supposed to be with real snakes?

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  13. Jeeez. We never knew about that rule either!! Is it hidden in the fine print?? OR, is this the NEW Monopoly of the 21st Century.

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    1. LOL! Maybe. I could have sworn at least one of us read the rules back when we were kids, but I don't remember that one. Of course, maybe they phrased it in a way that was hard to understand so we just ignored it.

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  14. ha, i've read that before but never played that way and i also didn't like when i found out the free parking wasn't really for gathering up all that loot, although that's how we still play...funny how we all basically play by the same "made-up" rules lol

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    1. It's like we have this hive brain when it comes to old board games :D

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  15. My older kids never played by that particular rule, either, when they played with their dad. First time they played with me, though...? I trounced them, HARD!

    I'm a reader of rule booklets. No one likes to play with me.

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  16. Ooh...dammit! I forgot! I left you an award!! Come by and pick it up!

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  17. Well, I think we're all outraged here. I weep for the time I have lost and the properties I collected low rent from.

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  18. Yep that's one of the rules. I've played that way before. I don't know if it ever increased or decreased my enjoyment of the game.

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    1. I suppose it depends on if you like a hard fought, drawn out game or not.

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  19. I agree - we didn't use to auction as a kid but now the game is out for ipad I discovered that rule too! Cheers

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    1. I had to choose between Monopoly and Trivial Pursuit on my iPad, and I went with TP, so I guess I would have known if I'd gotten the other one instead.

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  20. Well this is news to me, Kellie! With four siblings and no TV, this game was a mainstay in my childhood. Oh what battles we had ~ some of the best fun ever! I still play to win!

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  21. Holy crap I was never aware of that rule. Also I'm assuming Mayfair is some Australian thing (I believe it's Boardwalk here in the states) or else you bought a knock off version of the game. Is your game called Monopoly or Monaypoly?

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    1. Actually, I think we play the British version here, what with us being colonials and all ;D

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  22. Gawd! What a boring, tedious game. I've only played maybe twice in my life, and 'did it wrong' both times. No surprise there. Lol.

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    1. It is awfully long when you don't read the rules, apparently.

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  23. God, who cares! We all played it in the 70s and then moved on. As for other games, most kids don't get a handle on the rules anyway so really, in the grand scheme of things, NO ONE GIVES A SHIT!

    We all cheat anyway!

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    1. Well that's true, I couldn't even begin to tell you how many times I "nudged" the dice.

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  24. SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! All these years and we're playing it wrong? Can I get a redo on my childhood? ;)

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  25. This actually explains a whole about people. Apparently most people don't read the rules or instructions for ANYTHING. Now we have Warning Signs on products that will make you raise an eyebrow (or two). For example, many hair dryers come with warnings not to dry your hair while sleeping. Curling irons are not to be used in any orifices and are not intended as a foreplay device. (What moron turned on the curling iron and thought it was a good idea to Insert Here?) And Preparation H actually has a warning about not taking it orally. WTH? Can you imagine that complaint letter? Had to have been a letter since they could no longer speak. The Preparation H worked so well that there mouth was permanently closed!

    And the newest on the pile... Monopoly... the game we have been playing wrong for decades because most people don't read instructions.

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    1. A curling iron as a sex toy? Okay ... that just sounds unpleasant.

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  26. Something there is just no getting over. LOl. Played scrabble and mastermind, never been a fan of monopoly. xx

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    1. I always preferred Trivial Pursuit. Even as a child I was a Pub Trivia attendee in the making.

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  27. As a kid, I had an old Monopoly set. In case you're really curious, it's what the collectors call a 1936 Blue Box version. ANYWAY, the point is, the game had many differences from the modern (even then) version of the game. SO, yep, we were forced to read the rules. Every player got less money because every property cost less money. The pieces you moved around the board were art-deco looking wooden pieces. AND if you didn't purchase a property, it went up for auction.

    For years, I always assumed this was one of the differences between OLD Monopoly, and modern Monopoly. But, apparently, the only difference was, we actually bothered to learn the rules.

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    1. Wow, I bet that old set would be worth a lot of money these days!

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  28. Forget about the "auction" rule, what the hell is Mayfair?!?

    It's BOARDWALK!

    This news has rocked MY world. I have to leave now...

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    1. LOL! What can I say, we're colonials over here so we play the British version.

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  29. Your board properties in Oz are different from ours. I'd never heard of that rule either. I wonder if it, too, is just an Oz thing?

    S

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    1. We use the British board so I guess that's why it's different.

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  30. What people don't know if they don't read the rules. And I though that not reading the directions was supposed to be a "men only" thing. HA!

    Blessings and Bear hugs!
    Bears Noting, Life in the Urban Forest (poetry).

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    1. Up until now I would have said that too, but I guess I have to admit I never read them.

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  31. That's a rule? I don't look at it as them lying to us/me. Probably because I find me boring, let alone the game.

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    1. I only look at it as them lying because I don't want to have to admit it's my own fault.

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  32. I'm completely discombobulated.

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  33. We always played that way...I think that is part of my sheer loathing for Monopoly

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    1. In actuality, Monopoly is a pretty awful game when you think about it. It's about real estate, for god sake!

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  34. Free money on parking isn't allowed either. :P

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    1. We never played that rule, but it seems like a lot of other people did.

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  35. Having played with and without the auction (house rules do apply with these games, who ever owns the board, sets the rules!) I say you missed nothing. The auction one usually means one person dominates and then it's a game of crush everyone roll by roll. No thanks.

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    1. I think I'd still have preferred it to the long, drawn out battles we had.

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  36. Yes, at some point in my young life I read the rules. Suddenly a game of Monopoly was over in one day. Imagine! And none of that landing on 'Free parking' and grabbing up the dough in the center. I wonder where that 'rule' came from. I guess it worked the same as the kid who owned the one basketball in the neighborhood who made the rules for the game.

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    1. I'm beginning to think we have a hive mind when it comes to board games. How else do you explain all the weird rules that everyone plays by.

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  37. I am pretty sure we have always just made up our own rules on a number of games as the directions are just too long to read. That is true of various instruction manuals as well. Anything over about 6 paragraphs just beg me to figure it out myself.

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    1. That's true. Any set of rules that requires a booklet is too long, in my opinion.

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  38. lol! I never knew that rule either but I think as kids we played a lot of it wrong. I just remember spending hours upon hours around that board game on rainy days or late nights.

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    1. It does make me wonder what other games we played wrong as kids. If I had to guess, my money would be on Cluedo

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  39. My problem with Monopoly was that no one ever wanted to just call it quits. We, ignorant of that rule, would have to keep playing until somebody won. Missing dinner? Too bad. Time to go to bed? Too bad. It was like Monopoly was our own private suburban version of Highlander. There can be only one.

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  40. This rule is nearly as deadly as waiting to land on the property. Just a warning to the wise. My Hooligan is obsessed with Monopoly and we have created a 6-year-old real estate magnate monster who feels that "outshouting" and "outbidding" are the same thing in a property auction. I think the auction rule is perhaps a deterrent for people who skip over properties and don't buy them. Who does that?!

    Did you know that the instruction booklet also says that you shouldn't put money in the middle to win if you land on "Free Parking"? Ridiculous.

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    1. We shouted a lot over our games of Monopoly too, although it wasn't anything to do with bidding ;D

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  41. I didn't know about this rule either, although a property would never go up for auction in our family. Cheers from your newest follower!

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  42. Even Dad quit reading rules when he realized the rest of us cheat.

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    1. That's true, the higher the percentage of cheaters, the lower the need to read the rules.

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  43. Are you sure they're rules and not just guidelines? All those wasted hours! Hours!!

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    1. I'm pretty sure there are families that fractured after the fifth consecutive hour of a Monopoly game.

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  44. I played it wrong too.

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  45. Now, let me tell you something Kellie. The only reason that this rule came out from darkness was because someone who kept losing over a period of years decided to read the small print ie: the rules. This person should have been banned from Monopoly, because they were a bad loser, if you know what I mean. When people get angry they delve deep and start searching.

    Now, I'm going to continue playing my way, but be warned, now I know the rules, they will in no doubt have to be brought to the table. I'm not a sore loser...... :(

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    1. LOL! That's definitely one way to look at it. Bloody sore loser, destroying our happy little world of denial.

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  46. Too funny! My sisters and I made up so many different rules to the games we played we'd forget the real ones and would have to remind ourselves before we played with other people.

    For Monopoly, we put $500 in the middle of the board and anytime someone had to pay a "bill" on the Chance cards that went in there, too. Whoever landed directly on Free Parking got the loot.

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    1. A lot of people are saying they played that way, but we never did. I think it might have eased the pain of the auction rule if we had.

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  47. You just blew my mind!!! But I'll never get to use this new found information. I've been banned from playing Monopoly since I flipped the board back in '98.

    Hugs!

    Valerie

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    1. I'm pretty sure family feuds have started over a Monopoly board, so banning it might have been a good idea.

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  48. Personally, I blame the Hasbro people. Surely they must have realised we were all playing it wrong, it was never a secret that it took us all days to finish. They should have held a press conference or something.

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  49. They got rid of the iron? What next, the scotty dog?

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  50. I collect the different monopoly games. All have slightly different rules. And yep, I read the rules and played by them. Godfather Monopoly kicks serious ass. I also have Dual Master, and Spiderman, and though I am not a fan, really want the Dr Who version. I have been told there is a Canadian version out, but have never seen it.

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  51. Hi Kellie .. I saw articles on that .. but have to say I didn't stop to read - at some stage no doubt the details will appear once again and at that stage I'll find out ..

    Though does seem a little crazy .. but each family I've found has their own rules for some games .. I used to love monopoly! and Scrabble .. that one I still do ..

    Cheers Hilary

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  52. Holy crap. I'm going to a Hasbro party at BlogHer and I WILL get answers!

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  53. How the heck do you reply to all these comments, woman?! :)

    This post explains sooo much! I could never figure out why they would create a game where one match could last an entire childhood. Hey, do you suppose we were only supposed to play with half the deck in UNO?

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