Losing Twenty Seven Grand Because You Were Gullible Enough To Trust A Psychic? Awkward...

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Would you give a fortune teller twenty seven thousand dollars "just to hold onto" because she told you that you were too attached to money and needed to learn how to let go of it?

Yeah, me neither, but apparently that's what one woman did, worse luck for her.  

[Continued here...]

It's either a really thoughtful or really creepy ... and I have no idea which...

As a public servant, I have to admit I'm feeling a lot of sympathy for all those government employees in the US who've been furloughed.  I'm sorry, brothers and sisters, I know this is a hard time for all of you.

But as with any time of great hardship, some people step up and show just how dedicated they are to helping their fellow man.  No, I'm not talking about giving food, shelter, or temporary employment to those poor unfortunates who are currently sans paycheck.  The hero I'm referring to is giving them something much more ... intimate.

A Detroit sex toy manufacturer, out of the goodness of his heart, has decided to give away two hundred vibrators each day to people who are affected by the government shutdowns [link].  That's right, if you're one of the unlucky civil servant who suddenly has a whole lot of time on their hands, you now have something to fill that time ... and those hands.

Isn't that kind of him!  It's a stressful time, I'm sure you'll all agree, and he just wants to help everyone relax.  It's not like you've got anywhere else you need to be, so why not take advantage of his complementary buzzy gift?

But as generous as his offer is, I'm not entirely sure it's in everybody's best interests.

We all know how easy it is to get used to a new routine when we're on holidays.  I always make sure I don't take naps when I'm on a break, the last thing I want is to go back to work and then every afternoon at two feel like I need a bit of a kip.

Can you imagine how awkward things would get if everyone got into the habit of doing ... that ... half an hour after lunch, and then they're all called to go back to work?  Seriously, we can't let it happen.

The lines for the bathrooms are bad enough as it is.

Gen X versus Gen Y: The ultimate grudge match...

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I'm a member of Generation X.  I've always been rather proud of that.  We were the edgy ones, cooler and more open to change than our parents, the Baby Boomers.  We worked hard, had fun, and didn't worry about too many things ... possibly because we didn't have to live through any real hardships.  We were the cool ones!

Then the bloody Gen Y'ers arrived with their "I'll have exactly what I want and I'll have it right now, please" attitudes and their demands to be slotted right into senior positions rather than starting at the ground floor and working their way up, and spoiled it all for us.

When you see these twenty something's being put straight into senior roles in the workplace it can be a bit gauling.  We used to be seen as the go getters who were still hard working and diligent, now we were just the one's without any ambition who didn't get promoted to the role of senior executive by the age of twenty five.

That doesn't include me of course ... I never had any ambition to start with.  But it's a bit hard on my fellow Gen X'ers out there.

The one thing that makes it a little less annoying though is the fact that, while so many of them seem to end up in those positions, their tenure on average doesn't last long.  They come and go so quickly that you barely get a chance to work out if they're actually any good at their jobs or just managed to schmooze the interview panel.

A small, beligerant part of me wants to assume the latter.

Still, I suppose they have their good points (she says begrudgingly).  I've no doubt that computer and internet technology wouldn't be anywhere near as advanced as it is unless it was trying to cater to the "McDonald's Generation" who want their instant gratification entertainment, their focus on money and benefits in the workplace have benefitted us all, and I can't help thinking that it was mostly due to them that we finally moved away from the "age of the sitcom" and towards more conceptual television shows.

So, on behalf of the Gen X'ers out there, I'd like to say thank you, Gen Y'ers.  You might annoy us sometimes, and occasionally we might want to give you a shake and tell you to take a long hard look at yourselves, but you've done us a few solids.  We owe you one.

How did the hipster burn his tongue? He sipped his coffee before it was cool...

I don't get hipsters.

I means sure, I understand what they are.  You see them everywhere these days dressed in their carefully constructed thrift store style ensembles that probably cost more than any article of clothing I own, drinking coffee in edgy little hole-in-the-wall coffee shops that seem to exist only to serve that particular portion of the population.

But I don't get the motivation behind it all.

The only reason I'm even thinking about them at the moment is because my brother and I were talking about them the other day.  I told him I couldn't even really explain what a hipster was, and he defined them perfectly.

"Hipsters are people who spend a fortune so that they can act like they're poor and miserable"

It just seems so strange to me to expend so much effort just to seem bored and uninterested all the time.

And I think that's the main problem I have with understanding hipsters.  They don't seem be be able to get excited about anything!  They're always so unimpressed by whatever it is going on around them, and even when they do like something it's with that frustrating touch of irony.

I'm sorry, but I like to get excited about thing.  Like, jump up and down and wriggle around in your seat excited.  Sometimes it will be about something important like human rights victories, and sometimes it will be about stupid things like the most recent storyline on Glee, but the excitement and enthusiasm for my topic will be the same.

It kind of makes me feel sorry for them.  A life where I can't squeal with excitement because Kurt and Blaine got engaged?  Yeah, that's a life I don't want to have to live.

She can get herself a husband and all she needs to do is make him a few sammiches? Wow, he must be quite the catch...

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I like to think of myself as a relatively liberated woman.  I was lucky enough to grow up in an era where girls were told "You can be anything you want to be" and constantly reassured that we were just as good as any boy out there.

Of course, the fact that reassurances like that were still necessary probably dates me more than I'd like, but I still count myself lucky...

[Continued here...]

I'm not sure if I'm a literary snob or the classics equivalent of a Belieber...

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I know that it's not exactly fashionable to admit it anymore, but I have to confess something to you all.

I love Pride & Prejudice.

I know, I know, liking Lizzie Bennet and lusting after Mr Darcy is so 1995, but it's the truth.  I love P&P, always have, always will.

I remember the first time I read it back in high school, before it was synonymous with Colin Firth trudging sexily out of a lake.  I just adored it, and not in that "Ooh, it's Jane Austen, so everything of hers must be amazing" kind of way.  Truth be told, P&P is the only one I've ever been able to stand to read all the way through more than once.  Maybe that makes me a literary Plebeian, but I don't care.

But the point of this little rant to to make a recommendation to you all.  Go and check out the web series below, or mainline the whole thing by watching the playlist here [link].  It's a modern retelling of the story, with Lizzie as a media student who starts a video blog.  It's low budget, done completely in the style of vlogging, and is so clever!

It's actually finished now, and with 100 episodes at between three and four minutes each, that's almost six hours of viewing.  Honestly, if you like Pride and Prejudice even a little bit, you're going to love The Lizzie Bennet Diaries.

You're welcome.

Playing fast and loose with grammar ... it's not for the faint of heart...

I know that most people who do this whole "writing" thing are pretty full on about grammar.  Got to get all the punctuation in the right places, try not to dangle your participles, not mix up your their, there and they're.  

I, however, am most definitely NOT one of them.  I honestly couldn't give a rats about whether I'm appeasing the Grammar Nazis.  Plenty of my sentences end in prepositions, I regularly split my infinitives, and I start sentences with "and" so regularly that I'd practically forgotten that was a rule at all.

I suppose, for me it's really about what feels right.  How does it sound when I read it out loud?  If I think it flows, that means more to me than whether I'm making my high school English teacher pivot in her grave (sorry Mrs Bryant).

But, if it's all the same to you, maybe I'll keep the Oxford comma ... no one should have to see Stalin wearing a pair of pasties.